Is pre-marital therapy really necessary?
If you and your partner are interested in any long-term success: YES. Getting married without pre-marriage prep is like starting a business without planning how it will be successful . Half of all marriages today end in divorce and only half of those that endure are truly happy in the long run. If your parents divorced, it's likely that you want something different for your partnership. Many happy engaged couples assume that they won't be contributing to these continued depressing statistics. Some couples mistakenly believe that having lived together or known each other for a long time will prepare them for a lifelong commitment. Surprisingly, research shows that cohabiting couples have less marriage success than those who do not live together before marriage.
If you just wing it and count on your luck and romantic attachment to make specific aspects of your lifelong commitment a success, your odds are only one in four. But, with preparation, the odds of "marital bliss" being continually accessable are possible!
 Skill-based pre-marriage education can reduce the risk of divorce by 30% and lead to a significantly happier marriage, according to marriage research. It can also reduce the stress of the pre-wedding period, which unfortunately, can involve everyone BUT you and your partner! It is up to you whether you will do everything you can now to ensure that your dreams of a great life together are realized again and again.
Pre-marriage preparation is based on the reality that it's important to strengthen your relationship and prepare constructively for future challenges and life transitions, now while you have such easily positive energy in your relationship. The research shows that there is a window of opportunity during the year before the wedding and the six months or so after when couples get the optimum benefit from marriage preparation. Later, under stress, negative habits and relationship patterns may become established and be much harder to resolve.
Couples now face more demands and have fewer supports than ever before. The typical complex marriage - managing two careers while rearing children - really requires that couples have very strong, well-established abilities to communicate, resolve issues, maintain mutuality and set goals. Without this foundation, it's easy to feel overwhelmed by stress and time pressures. Problems can intrude much more easily than most couples realize. As much as it's important to come to terms with unrealistically positive expectations, those who grew up with divorced or unhappily married parents may find that they have unacknowledged and unexplored expectations that their marriage, too, may become unhappy. Marriage preparation functions as an immunization that boosts your capacity to handle potential difficulties. Couples need every advantage to succeed in today's marriages. www.stayhitched.com
http://www.twogetherintexas.com
Though the State of Texas does not currently recognize all committed partnerships, I support and welcome work with couples of any gender, race, or religion.
|
